10-minute guided self-compassion practice for mindfulness — before an interview

About this practice

When mindfulness shows up before an interview, this 10-minute self-compassion session gives you somewhere to put it down. A guided session of about 10 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: mindfulness

Attention spends most of its time in the past or the future. Being present is not a state you find, it is a return you keep making.

It tends to show up as:

• Missing conversations while composing replies
• Arriving somewhere with no memory of the walk
• Eating without tasting

Every return to the senses is a repetition of the actual skill. Losing it is part of the practice, not a break in it.

Doing this before an interview

• Do it where you will not be interrupted, even if that is a stairwell
• Have the first sentence of your answer ready afterwards
• Keep it short — there is no time for a long session

Nerves before an interview are normal and not something to eliminate. You need access to what you know, nothing more.

How self-compassion works

Self-compassion practice changes the tone of the inner voice rather than the content of the thoughts. It uses the same warmth and steadiness you would offer a friend, applied without requiring you to have earned it.

• Use the words you would actually say to someone you love
• Ask what you need, not what you deserve
• A hand on the chest or belly gives warmth and pressure a place to land

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Let the first out-breath be longer than the in-breath. Nothing dramatic, just longer.
2. 0:13Put a hand where the feeling is strongest. Warmth and pressure are the oldest kind of reassurance.
3. 0:28Now let your attention move from the room into your body, slowly, the way you'd move through a doorway you know well.
4. 0:46This is not a performance. Nobody is listening to how well you're doing it.
5. 1:00Notice the breath you're taking right now. That's the only one that exists.
6. 1:13Feel the last part of the exhale, where it turns into nothing.
7. 1:26Notice where your body is still holding something. Leave it alone.
8. 1:38Feel your belly. Let it be soft instead of held in.
9. 1:50Let your whole body be as heavy as it wants to be.
10. 2:03Feel the tops of your thighs.
11. 2:13Let the exhale carry a little of the here-and-now your attention skips with it. Not all of it. Just a little, one breath at a time.
12. 2:32Nothing about the ordinary present tense has to be explained or justified in this room.
13. 2:46Your mind will leave about a hundred times. Come back about a hundred times.
14. 3:00Notice the tone you are using on yourself. If it would wound a friend, it is not the truth.
15. 3:16Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
16. 3:28If you're bored, stay with the boredom for a moment. It's usually thinner than it looks.
17. 3:43Whatever you are about to say to yourself, imagine saying it to someone you love. Use those words.
18. 3:59No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
19. 4:10If nothing much is happening, that's not a problem. Nothing much is often the point.
20. 4:24The question is not what you deserve. It is what you need, right now, in this moment.
21. 4:39I'll stop for a moment. Take the pause at your own speed.
22. 4:52Breathe in for four, out for six, if you'd like something to count.
23. 5:05Let the quiet do its work.
24. 5:15Feel the parts of you that have gone quiet.
25. 5:26If you're holding your breath at the top, stop. There's no need to hold anything.
26. 5:40No rush to move on.
27. 5:49Notice your breathing, without changing it.
28. 5:59Let the out-breath be a little longer than the in-breath, without forcing it.
29. 6:12Take the next breath slowly.
30. 6:21Now the right shoulder. Let it be a centimetre lower than it was.
31. 6:34Let your breathing be boring. Boring is good here.
32. 6:45A few quiet breaths. That's all this is.
33. 6:56Notice the space around the present moment you keep leaving. It is there, even if it is small. Put your attention in that space.
34. 7:15If the here-and-now your attention skips starts telling you a story, let the story finish without you adding to it.
35. 7:32Breathe as if you had all evening. There's no rush in this part.
36. 7:45If the ordinary present tense has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
37. 8:02Notice if you're waiting for something to happen. Nothing is scheduled.
38. 8:14If you're replaying a conversation, let it play. It'll finish on its own.
39. 8:27Let me stop talking. Follow the breath instead.
40. 8:38You are allowed to have a hard time without earning it first.
41. 8:51Let this one be unhurried.
42. 9:00Let the quiet end on its own rather than cutting it off.
43. 9:13Come back at your own speed. The room will wait.
44. 9:25Let the pause stretch out.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.