Softening for falling asleep: 7 minutes, in the afternoon slump

About this practice

Nothing to learn and nothing to fix: 7 minutes of softening for falling asleep, in the afternoon slump. A guided session of about 7 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: falling asleep

Falling asleep is a passive process. The harder you aim at it, the further it moves, because the effort itself is arousal.

It tends to show up as:

• Watching the clock
• Getting frustrated at being awake
• Sleep only arriving after giving up

Attention on something boring and continuous is the oldest trick there is. That is all a sleep story is doing.

Doing this in the mid-afternoon

• Sit upright and open a window if you can
• Expect heaviness rather than fighting it
• A short session here beats a longer one that never happens

The dip is a normal circadian low. You are riding it out, not correcting a fault.

How softening works

Softening is the practice of releasing held tension degree by degree rather than all at once. It targets the physical grip — shoulders, jaw, gut — that persists long after the stressor has passed.

• Soften one place per exhale rather than everything at once
• Let warmth and gravity do the work instead of muscular effort
• If a place will not soften, leave it and go somewhere that will

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Check your hands. Are they doing anything? Let them stop.
2. 0:12Let the exhale do the work. On each one, allow a little more give.
3. 0:26Let your body feel heavier than it did a minute ago. Let the chair or the floor take it.
4. 0:42Notice your own pulse somewhere. Wrist, throat, wherever you can find it.
5. 0:55Notice the small pause before your body decides to breathe in again.
6. 1:08Follow three breaths and let the fourth one go unobserved.
7. 1:20Feel your palms. Warm or cool, either is fine.
8. 1:31Feel the outline of yourself, from the top of your head to your heels.
9. 1:45Notice your hands again. Check whether they've loosened on their own.
10. 1:57Feel the weight of the slow drift toward sleep somewhere specific, then let the floor take a share of it.
11. 2:14If the thoughts that keep the light on has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
12. 2:33Feel your calves, front and back.
13. 2:43Remain here for a few more breaths.
14. 2:53Notice that you don't have to start a breath. It arrives by itself.
15. 3:06Feel the skin around your eyes. Let the muscles behind them go loose.
16. 3:19If you're thinking about the next thing on your list, that list will still be there.
17. 3:34A short silence. Let it be empty.
18. 3:44Find the tightest place and simply breathe near it. Warmth does the softening, not effort.
19. 3:58Notice if you're waiting for something to happen. Nothing is scheduled.
20. 4:10Feel the air move past your upper lip. It's the coolest spot on the way in.
21. 4:25A few quiet breaths. That's all this is.
22. 4:36Notice where the surrender at the end of the day lives in your body. Chest, throat, stomach. Rest your attention there without trying to change it.
23. 4:55Notice how the slow drift toward sleep changes shape when you stop resisting it. Usually it gets smaller, not bigger.
24. 5:12Notice where you feel the breath most clearly. Nose, chest, or belly — pick one and stay there.
25. 5:28If you feel restless, that's a feeling, not a failure.
26. 5:40If your mind has wandered, that's not a mistake. Noticing is the practice.
27. 5:53A gap. Don't rush to fill it with thinking.
28. 6:04With every out-breath, soften one place. Shoulders first, then jaw, then the space behind the eyes.
29. 6:19Come back to your body first, and the rest of the day second.
30. 6:32Notice if anything has loosened. Even slightly counts.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.