Tension headaches: 20-minute gratitude meditation, on a rest day

About this practice

20 minutes to meet tension headaches with less of a fight. A gratitude practice, on a rest day. A guided session of about 20 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: tension headaches

Tension headaches follow a band of tightness across the forehead and around the skull, usually the product of long staring, jaw clenching and neck position.

It tends to show up as:

• A band of pressure across the forehead
• Pressure behind the eyes
• Ache worsening through the day

Softening the jaw, eyes and neck interrupts the pattern early. Once a tension headache settles in it is harder to shift.

Doing this on a rest day

• Do it without a reason or a target
• Later in the day, unhurried, in good light
• Let it be longer than usual if you want

Rest that has to be justified is not really rest. This one is allowed to be pointless.

How gratitude works

Gratitude here is an attention practice, not a demand for a positive mood. Attention defaults to threats because they are urgent, so pleasant and ordinary things get skipped simply for being safe.

• Pick one ordinary thing rather than something impressive
• Stay with it for two breaths — depth beats length of list
• Do not aim at feeling grateful; aim at noticing

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00If you're sitting, let the chair do the work of holding you upright.
2. 0:13Pick one ordinary thing from today — a warm drink, a dry walk, a message — and let it count.
3. 0:30There's a difference between relaxing and stopping. We're aiming for the second one, gently.
4. 0:44Let your body feel heavier than it did a minute ago. Let the chair or the floor take it.
5. 1:00Notice where you feel the breath most clearly. Nose, chest, or belly — pick one and stay there.
6. 1:16Let your breathing find the rhythm it uses when you're almost asleep.
7. 1:29Feel your hips. Wide, heavy, and doing nothing.
8. 1:40Notice your lower back. Let it curve however it curves.
9. 1:52Feel your belly. Let it be soft instead of held in.
10. 2:04Feel your heart somewhere in there, doing its work without instructions.
11. 2:16Notice your eyebrows. They're probably doing something small right now.
12. 2:28Notice the space around the ache from a long staring day. It is there, even if it is small. Put your attention in that space.
13. 2:47You do not have to solve the band around the forehead in these few minutes. Your only job is to keep breathing while it is here.
14. 3:06Notice that you don't have to start a breath. It arrives by itself.
15. 3:19Picture the pressure building behind the eyes as a weather front passing over. You are not the weather. You are the sky it moves through.
16. 3:38the ache from a long staring day may quiet down, or it may not. Either is fine. We are practising staying, not performing calm.
17. 3:57Follow the breath down into your belly and feel it come back up.
18. 4:10Notice how you're sitting. Adjust if you need to. Then settle again.
19. 4:23If nothing comes, notice that something did not go wrong. That also counts.
20. 4:36Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
21. 4:48Notice the pull to make this mean something. It doesn't have to.
22. 5:01We are not forcing positivity. We are just noticing what went right, however small.
23. 5:15I'll step back. You stay here.
24. 5:25If your mind is quiet, don't grab at it. Quiet comes and goes too.
25. 5:39There is no need to feel grateful. Just look, and see what is actually there.
26. 5:53A short silence. Let it be empty.
27. 6:03If you're irritated, that's allowed. Irritation is just weather.
28. 6:14Let it be unimpressive. Small good things are the most reliable ones.
29. 6:27I'll be quiet for a moment. Stay with the breath.
30. 6:39Notice the difference between a thought and the space around it.
31. 6:51Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
32. 7:01Follow three breaths and let the fourth one go unobserved.
33. 7:13Feel the front of your chest. Notice it rise and fall once.
34. 7:26I'll leave a gap here. Use it however you like.
35. 7:38If you're distracted by a sound, let the sound be the object for a moment.
36. 7:52Stay here a little longer.
37. 8:01Feel your breath move down your back, all the way to your lower ribs.
38. 8:15Let your thumbs rest wherever they landed.
39. 8:25Let me stop talking. Follow the breath instead.
40. 8:36Notice how quickly your mind labels things: good, bad, boring, nice.
41. 8:48Let the quiet do its work.
42. 8:58Feel the pause at the top of the in-breath. It's shorter than you think.
43. 9:12Notice your hands again. Check whether they've loosened on their own.
44. 9:24Pause here. Count three breaths if you need an anchor.
45. 9:36Notice how many breaths you take in a minute. Don't change the number, just check.
46. 9:50Nothing changes for a moment.
47. 9:59Notice the moment you realise you've drifted. That moment is the whole skill.
48. 10:12A few quiet breaths. That's all this is.
49. 10:23Notice the small movement in your belly when you breathe.
50. 10:35Let your belly rise first, then your chest, then the tops of your lungs.
51. 10:49Remain here for a few more breaths.
52. 10:59Notice any part of you that wants this to be over.
53. 11:11A gap. Don't rush to fill it with thinking.
54. 11:22Notice your ears, which mostly just receive things.
55. 11:33Notice if your breathing is faster than you expected. Don't correct it. Just note it.
56. 11:47Keep following the air.
57. 11:56If you're counting the minutes, that's fine. Count them and come back.
58. 12:09Silence for a few breaths. Nothing to do in it.
59. 12:21Now feel both feet at once. That's a lot of contact with the world.
60. 12:35Notice your breathing getting quieter on its own, without you deciding anything.
61. 12:48Take the next breath slowly.
62. 12:57Notice your fingers, one by one, starting with the little finger.
63. 13:09Let the exhale empty you a little more than usual, but not to the point of strain.
64. 13:24Stay with it.
65. 13:32Feel the skin around your eyes. Let the muscles behind them go loose.
66. 13:45Feel the slight stretch at the very bottom of the exhale.
67. 13:57A few seconds more.
68. 14:06Feel the outline of yourself, from the top of your head to your heels.
69. 14:20Let the breath get soft, the way it goes when someone is reading beside you.
70. 14:34Let your body keep settling.
71. 14:43Feel the parts of you that have gone quiet.
72. 14:54Let the exhale carry a little of the band around the forehead with it. Not all of it. Just a little, one breath at a time.
73. 15:13No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
74. 15:24When the pressure building behind the eyes arrives, name it once, quietly, and go back to the breath. Naming is not fixing, and that is fine.
75. 15:43Let the breath be slow enough that you can hear it, just barely.
76. 15:56This is not the last time the ache from a long staring day will visit. That is not bad news. It means you will get more practice.
77. 16:16When the band around the forehead presses in, put a hand on your chest or your belly. Warmth and pressure are anchors your body already trusts.
78. 16:35Let the out-breath be a little longer than the in-breath, without forcing it.
79. 16:48Feel the weight of the pressure building behind the eyes somewhere specific, then let the floor take a share of it.
80. 17:05You do not have to like the ache from a long staring day to breathe through it. Liking was never the requirement.
81. 17:23Feel the air as it passes the back of your throat. It's cooler going in.
82. 17:37Notice if you've been frowning at your own thoughts.
83. 17:48If your body wants to move, let it move, then come back.
84. 18:01If you're judging your performance, that's the same habit as judging everything else.
85. 18:14Let's pause. Just the breathing for a while.
86. 18:25Stay with it for two breaths. Gratitude deepens by staying, not by listing.
87. 18:38Let it be this simple.
88. 18:47Start to notice the edges of your body again, and the surface you're on.
89. 19:01Let your breathing go back to whatever it does when nobody is watching.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.