Anger: 15-minute breathing meditation, on a day off

About this practice

When anger shows up on a day off, this 15-minute breathing session gives you somewhere to put it down. A guided session of about 15 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: anger

Anger is a fast, full-body response. Blood moves to the hands and jaw, heart rate climbs sharply, and reasoning comes back online several minutes later.

It tends to show up as:

• Heat in the chest and face
• The urge to speak before thinking
• A clenched jaw or fists

The physical peak passes in about ninety seconds if it is not fed. Slow breathing uses those seconds rather than spending them.

Doing this on a rest day

• Do it without a reason or a target
• Later in the day, unhurried, in good light
• Let it be longer than usual if you want

Rest that has to be justified is not really rest. This one is allowed to be pointless.

How breathing works

A breathing practice uses the breath as the object of attention and as the control lever. Because exhaling slows the heart through the vagus nerve, it acts on the nervous system directly rather than through thinking.

• Keep the exhale longer than the inhale — that is the active ingredient
• Count the exhales and start again whenever you lose count
• Do not force depth; let the breath find its own level

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Notice the temperature of the air on the backs of your hands.
2. 0:13We'll keep it quiet and unhurried.
3. 0:23Now let your attention move from the room into your body, slowly, the way you'd move through a doorway you know well.
4. 0:41If some part of you is resisting this, that resistance is worth noticing too.
5. 0:55Notice the difference between the breath at the front of your nose and the breath in your chest.
6. 1:11Let the exhale empty you a little more than usual, but not to the point of strain.
7. 1:26Notice your shins, which take small knocks all day and never complain.
8. 1:39Feel the skin around your eyes. Let the muscles behind them go loose.
9. 1:52Let your whole body be as heavy as it wants to be.
10. 2:05Feel the back of your neck. That's a place that holds a lot.
11. 2:18Feel your forearms, from the elbow down to the wrist.
12. 2:30Give the white-hot moment before you speak a shape, a colour, a temperature. Turning it into something specific makes it easier to hold.
13. 2:48Let the exhale carry a little of the heat rising in your chest with it. Not all of it. Just a little, one breath at a time.
14. 3:08Let the breath be shallow if shallow is what your body wants.
15. 3:21You do not have to like the urge to snap to breathe through it. Liking was never the requirement.
16. 3:37You have been carrying the white-hot moment before you speak for a while. You can set it down for the length of this session and pick it up after.
17. 3:58Feel your heart somewhere in there, doing its work without instructions.
18. 4:10Nothing changes for a moment.
19. 4:19Notice the first breath of the day versus this one. They're the same mechanism.
20. 4:33Notice your heels making contact with the floor or the bed.
21. 4:45Let the pause stretch out.
22. 4:54Let the exhale fall out rather than pushing it.
23. 5:05Now the right shoulder. Let it be a centimetre lower than it was.
24. 5:18No need to open your eyes yet.
25. 5:28Let your ribs widen on the in-breath instead of your shoulders lifting.
26. 5:41Feel your tongue sitting in the bottom of your mouth.
27. 5:53Stay here a little longer.
28. 6:02Let the breath get soft, the way it goes when someone is reading beside you.
29. 6:16Feel your face. It's probably softer than it was five minutes ago.
30. 6:29Stay with it.
31. 6:37Count down from ten, one number per exhale.
32. 6:48Notice your toes, starting with the big one on the left.
33. 7:00Let it be this simple.
34. 7:09I'll be quiet for a moment. Stay with the breath.
35. 7:21You can be as unimpressive as you like for the next few minutes.
36. 7:34Notice if your attention is in the future. Bring it back to the room.
37. 7:48A short silence. Let it be empty.
38. 7:58Small efforts are the whole method.
39. 8:08If you've lost track of where we were, you haven't lost anything important.
40. 8:21Let's pause. Just the breathing for a while.
41. 8:32There's no need to try harder than this.
42. 8:43If you're distracted by a sound, let the sound be the object for a moment.
43. 8:57I'll stop for a moment. Take the pause at your own speed.
44. 9:10Nothing here needs to be efficient.
45. 9:20Notice if you've been frowning at your own thoughts.
46. 9:31Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
47. 9:43Let this be easy, if easy is available.
48. 9:54If you're judging your performance, that's the same habit as judging everything else.
49. 10:07No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
50. 10:18If you only manage half of it, that's half more than nothing.
51. 10:31If your body wants to move, let it move, then come back.
52. 10:44Breathe in for four, out for six, if you'd like something to count.
53. 10:57I'll leave a gap here. Use it however you like.
54. 11:09Let the heat rising in your chest be exactly as big as it is, and let your breath be exactly as slow as it is. They can coexist.
55. 11:29You do not have to win against the urge to snap. You only have to breathe until the next moment arrives.
56. 11:46Let each breath out be a small letting go of the muscles around your ribs.
57. 12:00Feel the weight of the white-hot moment before you speak somewhere specific, then let the floor take a share of it.
58. 12:17Think of the heat rising in your chest as a guest that arrived without knocking. You can let it stand in the hallway.
59. 12:35Count four breaths silently. Then stop counting and just follow.
60. 12:47Notice the tone of your own inner voice. Is it kind?
61. 12:59If nothing much is happening, that's not a problem. Nothing much is often the point.
62. 13:13Notice how quickly your mind labels things: good, bad, boring, nice.
63. 13:25A gap. Don't rush to fill it with thinking.
64. 13:36We'll take this slowly, and there's no version of this where you get it wrong.
65. 13:50Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
66. 14:00Let the quiet end on its own rather than cutting it off.
67. 14:13Let your eyes open when they're ready, not when the words end.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.