Insomnia: 7-minute softening meditation, during the evening wind-down

About this practice

Nothing to learn and nothing to fix: 7 minutes of softening for insomnia, during the evening wind-down. A guided session of about 7 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: insomnia

Insomnia is often maintained by the fear of not sleeping. Anticipating a bad night raises arousal at bedtime, which produces the bad night.

It tends to show up as:

• Dreading bedtime
• Hours awake with a busy mind
• Sleeping worse as the week goes on

Removing the pressure to sleep is the active ingredient. This gives you something to do that is not trying.

Doing this in the evening

• Dim the lights first — bright light works against the point
• Put the phone in another room
• Keep it slow rather than interesting

Something too engaging will wake you up rather than wind you down.

How softening works

Softening is the practice of releasing held tension degree by degree rather than all at once. It targets the physical grip — shoulders, jaw, gut — that persists long after the stressor has passed.

• Soften one place per exhale rather than everything at once
• Let warmth and gravity do the work instead of muscular effort
• If a place will not soften, leave it and go somewhere that will

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Start by hearing the furthest sound you can find.
2. 0:11We'll keep it quiet and unhurried.
3. 0:21Nothing here needs to be pleasant. Neutral is fine. Dull is fine.
4. 0:34Let your attention rest on the out-breath. The in-breath can take care of itself.
5. 0:48Breathe as if you had all evening. There's no rush in this part.
6. 1:01Notice your breathing getting quieter on its own, without you deciding anything.
7. 1:14Notice your ears, which mostly just receive things.
8. 1:25Feel the middle of your back, the part that never gets attention.
9. 1:38Notice your jaw again. Let your back teeth part slightly.
10. 1:50If the wide-awake mind at 2am shows up, let it be there without arguing with it. You are not trying to remove it, just to sit beside it.
11. 2:10Give the counting of hours until morning a shape, a colour, a temperature. Turning it into something specific makes it easier to hold.
12. 2:28Let your throat soften. There's nothing to swallow right now.
13. 2:40Just the breath, still.
14. 2:49Let the exhale fall out rather than pushing it.
15. 3:00Let the whole of your left foot be heavy.
16. 3:11If you're counting the minutes, that's fine. Count them and come back.
17. 3:24Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
18. 3:36Nothing here needs to be efficient.
19. 3:46If you're irritated, that's allowed. Irritation is just weather.
20. 3:57Feel the air as it passes the back of your throat. It's cooler going in.
21. 4:11I'll leave a gap here. Use it however you like.
22. 4:23Remind yourself, slowly: I am safe in this moment, even while the frustration of not sleeping is here. Safety and difficulty can share a room.
23. 4:42When the wide-awake mind at 2am arrives, name it once, quietly, and go back to the breath. Naming is not fixing, and that is fine.
24. 5:01Let the out-breath be a little longer than the in-breath, without forcing it.
25. 5:14Notice the exact moment your attention left. You probably won't catch it. That's normal.
26. 5:28If you're thinking about the next thing on your list, that list will still be there.
27. 5:43Quiet now. The next part will wait for you.
28. 5:54If you only manage half of it, that's half more than nothing.
29. 6:07Notice the quiet you made, and let it close gently.
30. 6:19Stand up when you're ready. The list hasn't grown while you were here.
31. 6:32Let the quiet do its work.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.