All guides
The complete list of guides on SoftlyStill — 420 pieces, newest first, 30 to a page.
What to do when everything is too much, in plain terms, when you are not sure this will work
Overwhelm is not a lack of capacity. It is too many open loops and no order to them. The fix is unglamorous.
Read →When the inner voice will not let something go — the essentials, when you are not in the mood
Self-criticism usually repeats because it is trying to prevent something. Arguing with it does not work. Understanding it sometimes does.
Read →Working in a noisy place without losing your mind — what to expect, when you are somewhere unfamiliar
You cannot always control the noise. You can control what your attention does with it, and what you put in your ears.
Read →The five minutes after a difficult meeting — the version that fits a real week, when you feel restless rather than tired
Back-to-back meetings leave no room to come down. Five deliberate minutes changes the next hour.
Read →What to do when you wake at 3am — what actually helps, if you are tired of apps
Waking in the middle of the night is normal. What turns it into an hour of lying awake is the reaction to it.
Read →Preparing for a conversation you are dreading, without the usual advice, if you have done this a hundred times
Most dread is about the first thirty seconds, not the conversation. Prepare for those and the rest gets easier.
Read →When to drink coffee so it does not ruin your sleep — what to try first, when you have already had a long week
Caffeine has a long tail. The cup at 3pm is still in your system at 9pm, whether you feel it or not.
Read →Using your body to come down after something stressful, in the order that helps, on a low-energy afternoon
After a stress response, the body is left with fuel it did not use. Some of the recovery is physical, not mental.
Read →Do you actually need eight glasses of water — where to start, when you cannot concentrate on anything else
Eight glasses is a number with no particular evidence behind it. Thirst and urine colour are better guides.
Read →Breathing exercises that help during panic — the unglamorous version, when you have been on screens all day
Deep breathing is the wrong advice during panic. What helps is a longer exhale and something concrete to count.
Read →A morning routine that survives a bad night — a plain-language guide, when you have woken up too early
Most morning routines are designed for people who slept well. Here is a version that works on four hours.
Read →Why anxiety shows up in your body first — what nobody tells you, when the day has been loud
Racing heart, tight chest, churning stomach. Understanding the mechanism makes the symptoms less frightening.
Read →Tired eyes after a long day of screens — the basics, done properly, when you feel fine and want to stay that way
Eye strain is mostly about distance and blinking, not about blue light glasses.
Read →Why your weekend does not feel like rest — a short read, if you have five quiet minutes
Rest is not the absence of work. If the weekend is full of decisions and obligations, it does not restore anything.
Read →How to get through the first hour without your phone, without the usual nonsense, when you have tried everything else
The first hour sets the tone for attention all day. You do not need willpower — you need the phone to be somewhere else.
Read →How to study when you cannot concentrate — the version for a bad week, when you have just finished work
Concentration is usually a problem of task size, not willpower. Shrink the task until starting feels almost silly.
Read →A wind-down that starts before you are tired — explained without jargon, before you go back to something hard
Waiting until you feel sleepy usually means waiting until midnight. The wind-down is what creates the sleepiness.
Read →Waking up anxious for no obvious reason, in plain terms, when you want to be left alone
Morning anxiety is common and usually chemical rather than psychological. Cortisol rises steeply in the first hour after waking.
Read →When to be careful with breathing exercises — the essentials, if you are new to this
Breathing exercises are generally very safe, but there are situations where the standard advice needs adjusting.
Read →Releasing tension you did not notice you were holding — what to expect, when your attention is scattered
By mid-afternoon most people are holding their shoulders, jaw and hands without knowing. Here is a two-minute check.
Read →Using the commute as a boundary between work and home — the version that fits a real week, when you have been meaning to start
The commute is the only transition most people get. Used deliberately, it stops the workday following you into the kitchen.
Read →Ten minutes outside is not a wellness cliché — what actually helps, when nothing else has worked today
It is the least fashionable intervention available and one of the most reliable. Here is what it actually does.
Read →When grief arrives out of nowhere, without the usual advice, when you are on your own
Grief does not follow a schedule. The waves come less often over time, but they do not stop, and that is not a failure.
Read →How to stop scrolling in bed — what to try first, if you are fitting this around other people
The phone is not the problem. The fact that it is within reach and there is nothing else to do is the problem. Here is what actually helps.
Read →What to do when everything is too much — an honest guide, when you have more time than usual
Overwhelm is not a lack of capacity. It is too many open loops and no order to them. The fix is unglamorous.
Read →When the inner voice will not let something go, step by step, when you have been putting it off
Self-criticism usually repeats because it is trying to prevent something. Arguing with it does not work. Understanding it sometimes does.
Read →Working in a noisy place without losing your mind — what works and what does not, if you are sceptical about all of this
You cannot always control the noise. You can control what your attention does with it, and what you put in your ears.
Read →The five minutes after a difficult meeting — a plain-language guide, when you are cold and want to be warm
Back-to-back meetings leave no room to come down. Five deliberate minutes changes the next hour.
Read →What to do when you wake at 3am — what nobody tells you, when you only have a few minutes
Waking in the middle of the night is normal. What turns it into an hour of lying awake is the reaction to it.
Read →Preparing for a conversation you are dreading — the basics, done properly, when you want something simple
Most dread is about the first thirty seconds, not the conversation. Prepare for those and the rest gets easier.
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