Sleep: 10-minute softening meditation, in the office

About this practice

Nothing to learn and nothing to fix: 10 minutes of softening for sleep, in the office. A guided session of about 10 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: sleep

Sleep arrives on a downslope, not on command. Arousal has to fall for some minutes before the switch flips, and trying harder keeps it up.

It tends to show up as:

• Getting a second wind at bedtime
• Mind starting up as soon as the light goes off
• Sleep arriving much later than you intended

The practice is to stop steering. Following a slow voice occupies the part of the mind that would otherwise be trying.

Doing this at your desk

• Feet flat, back supported, screen away from your eyeline
• You can do this with your eyes open if the office makes closing them awkward
• Unclench the jaw and drop the shoulders first, before anything else

Nobody needs to know you are doing it. Keep it invisible if that makes it possible.

How softening works

Softening is the practice of releasing held tension degree by degree rather than all at once. It targets the physical grip — shoulders, jaw, gut — that persists long after the stressor has passed.

• Soften one place per exhale rather than everything at once
• Let warmth and gravity do the work instead of muscular effort
• If a place will not soften, leave it and go somewhere that will

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00If you're tired, you can let that be true. Tired is allowed here.
2. 0:13Unclenching is not the same as relaxing. Just stop adding the tension back.
3. 0:26You can think about other things. When you notice, come back. That's the whole practice.
4. 0:40Notice your own pulse somewhere. Wrist, throat, wherever you can find it.
5. 0:53Feel the air as it passes the back of your throat. It's cooler going in.
6. 1:07Let your breathing be boring. Boring is good here.
7. 1:18Start at the top of your head. Notice the scalp, which you almost never notice.
8. 1:32Let the whole of your right foot be heavy.
9. 1:43Let your throat soften. There's nothing to swallow right now.
10. 1:55Move to your forehead. Let it be smooth instead of gathered.
11. 2:07Think of the quiet your mind keeps postponing as a guest that arrived without knocking. You can let it stand in the hallway.
12. 2:25If the heaviness your body already knows starts telling you a story, let the story finish without you adding to it.
13. 2:42Notice the difference between a thought and the space around it.
14. 2:54With every out-breath, soften one place. Shoulders first, then jaw, then the space behind the eyes.
15. 3:09Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
16. 3:21Notice anything you're holding onto from earlier today.
17. 3:32We are not forcing anything open. We are letting things unclench by a single degree.
18. 3:46I'll be quiet for a moment. Stay with the breath.
19. 3:58If nothing much is happening, that's not a problem. Nothing much is often the point.
20. 4:12Let the exhale do the work. On each one, allow a little more give.
21. 4:26Silence for a few breaths. Nothing to do in it.
22. 4:38Notice if you're waiting for something to happen. Nothing is scheduled.
23. 4:50Let the breath be shallow if shallow is what your body wants.
24. 5:03Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
25. 5:13Notice your hands again. Check whether they've loosened on their own.
26. 5:25Breathe in through your nose and out through your nose, if that's comfortable.
27. 5:38Keep following the air.
28. 5:47Notice your heels making contact with the floor or the bed.
29. 5:59Let your breathing get quieter rather than deeper.
30. 6:10Just the breath, still.
31. 6:19Notice the space between your shoulder blades.
32. 6:29Let the exhale empty you a little more than usual, but not to the point of strain.
33. 6:44I'll stop for a moment. Take the pause at your own speed.
34. 6:57Imagine the day folding itself up as a room you can walk out of for a minute. The room will still be there.
35. 7:15Give the quiet your mind keeps postponing a shape, a colour, a temperature. Turning it into something specific makes it easier to hold.
36. 7:33Follow the breath down into your belly and feel it come back up.
37. 7:46Notice how the heaviness your body already knows changes shape when you stop resisting it. Usually it gets smaller, not bigger.
38. 8:03If you're bored, stay with the boredom for a moment. It's usually thinner than it looks.
39. 8:18Notice the pull to make this mean something. It doesn't have to.
40. 8:31Let's pause. Just the breathing for a while.
41. 8:42If a place will not soften, leave it alone and go somewhere that will. It often follows.
42. 8:57No need to open your eyes yet.
43. 9:07Let your eyes open when they're ready, not when the words end.
44. 9:20Notice the quiet you made, and let it close gently.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.