Meditation for frustration: 3-minute self-compassion session, in the office

About this practice

A 3-minute self-compassion session for frustration, in the office. No app, no account — press start. A guided session of about 3 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: frustration

Frustration is blocked progress, repeated. Each small obstruction adds to a background irritation that eventually has nothing to do with the original cause.

It tends to show up as:

• Sighing more than usual
• Everything feeling slightly too slow
• A short fuse over minor things

Releasing some physical tension interrupts the accumulation. Frustration is often held in the jaw and hands more than it is thought about.

Doing this at your desk

• Feet flat, back supported, screen away from your eyeline
• You can do this with your eyes open if the office makes closing them awkward
• Unclench the jaw and drop the shoulders first, before anything else

Nobody needs to know you are doing it. Keep it invisible if that makes it possible.

How self-compassion works

Self-compassion practice changes the tone of the inner voice rather than the content of the thoughts. It uses the same warmth and steadiness you would offer a friend, applied without requiring you to have earned it.

• Use the words you would actually say to someone you love
• Ask what you need, not what you deserve
• A hand on the chest or belly gives warmth and pressure a place to land

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Let your forehead smooth out. Most of us hold a small frown there all day.
2. 0:14Whatever you are about to say to yourself, imagine saying it to someone you love. Use those words.
3. 0:30Let the breath get a little quieter, as if you were trying not to wake someone sleeping nearby.
4. 0:46Let the breath move at the speed of a sleeping person.
5. 0:58Feel the air move past your upper lip. It's the coolest spot on the way in.
6. 1:13Feel your ankles. Let them be loose.
7. 1:23There is a part of you that has handled hard moments before. That part is here now, even if it is quiet.
8. 1:41Imagine softening the edges of the repeated small irritations. Not erasing it, just letting the sharp parts go a degree softer.
9. 1:58Notice your breathing getting quieter on its own, without you deciding anything.
10. 2:11Say to yourself: this is uncomfortable, and I can stay with it for one more breath. Then take that breath.
11. 2:28If a worry shows up, name it quietly and let it sit beside you.
12. 2:42Put a hand where the feeling is strongest. Warmth and pressure are the oldest kind of reassurance.
13. 2:57Let the quiet end on its own rather than cutting it off.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.