3-minute gratitude meditation for the inner critic, in the office

About this practice

Slow, spoken guidance for the inner critic. A gratitude session you can do in the office. A guided session of about 3 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: the inner critic

The inner critic often formed as a protective strategy, keeping you small to keep you safe. It is loudest where you feel most exposed.

It tends to show up as:

• A judge commenting on everything
• Anticipating criticism before it comes
• Difficulty accepting praise

You can notice the voice without obeying it. Distance between the voice and the response is the whole gain.

Doing this at your desk

• Feet flat, back supported, screen away from your eyeline
• You can do this with your eyes open if the office makes closing them awkward
• Unclench the jaw and drop the shoulders first, before anything else

Nobody needs to know you are doing it. Keep it invisible if that makes it possible.

How gratitude works

Gratitude here is an attention practice, not a demand for a positive mood. Attention defaults to threats because they are urgent, so pleasant and ordinary things get skipped simply for being safe.

• Pick one ordinary thing rather than something impressive
• Stay with it for two breaths — depth beats length of list
• Do not aim at feeling grateful; aim at noticing

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00There is nothing to get right here. Nothing is being scored.
2. 0:12There is no need to feel grateful. Just look, and see what is actually there.
3. 0:26If your mind is loud, that's information, not failure.
4. 0:37Notice the small gap after each exhale. Rest there for half a second.
5. 0:50Notice your breathing getting quieter on its own, without you deciding anything.
6. 1:03Feel your hips. Wide, heavy, and doing nothing.
7. 1:14Notice where the judge in your head lives in your body. Chest, throat, stomach. Rest your attention there without trying to change it.
8. 1:32Notice the space around the running commentary on your flaws. It is there, even if it is small. Put your attention in that space.
9. 1:51Let the breath get soft, the way it goes when someone is reading beside you.
10. 2:05You have been carrying the voice that grades everything for a while. You can set it down for the length of this session and pick it up after.
11. 2:25If nothing much is happening, that's not a problem. Nothing much is often the point.
12. 2:39We are not forcing positivity. We are just noticing what went right, however small.
13. 2:53Stand up when you're ready. The list hasn't grown while you were here.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.