Self-compassion for restlessness at night: 7 minutes, before a presentation

About this practice

7 minutes to meet restlessness at night with less of a fight. A self-compassion practice, before a presentation. A guided session of about 7 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: restlessness at night

At night, arousal with nowhere to go turns into physical restlessness — turning, kicking, rearranging pillows, unable to find a settled position.

It tends to show up as:

• Buzzing legs or an urge to move
• Changing position every few minutes
• Feeling wired rather than sleepy

Giving attention a slow, fixed task reduces the urge to keep moving, without asking the body to be still all at once.

Doing this before public speaking

• Do it somewhere private, or in the washroom if needed
• Slow the exhale deliberately and check your speaking pace after
• Warm the voice by reading a line aloud, not by staying silent

Rushing is the tell of nerves. A slower breath now is what sets a slower pace in the room.

How self-compassion works

Self-compassion practice changes the tone of the inner voice rather than the content of the thoughts. It uses the same warmth and steadiness you would offer a friend, applied without requiring you to have earned it.

• Use the words you would actually say to someone you love
• Ask what you need, not what you deserve
• A hand on the chest or belly gives warmth and pressure a place to land

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Take a moment to notice the room behind you, without turning around.
2. 0:13You can be as unimpressive as you like for the next few minutes.
3. 0:26We'll be quiet for a bit longer than usual. Stay with whatever shows up.
4. 0:40Now let your attention move from the room into your body, slowly, the way you'd move through a doorway you know well.
5. 0:58Let your breathing be boring. Boring is good here.
6. 1:09Let the in-breath be short and the out-breath unhurried.
7. 1:20Notice your lower back. Let it curve however it curves.
8. 1:32Notice your fingers, one by one, starting with the little finger.
9. 1:44Let your thumbs rest wherever they landed.
10. 1:54Remind yourself, slowly: I am safe in this moment, even while the fidgety legs and turning mind is here. Safety and difficulty can share a room.
11. 2:13You do not have to win against the alertness after dark. You only have to breathe until the next moment arrives.
12. 2:30Let your whole body be as heavy as it wants to be.
13. 2:43Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
14. 2:53Feel the air move past your upper lip. It's the coolest spot on the way in.
15. 3:08Notice your elbows. Odd things to have, but there they are.
16. 3:20If a song is stuck in your head, let it play in the background.
17. 3:34I'll be quiet for a moment. Stay with the breath.
18. 3:46Nothing here needs to be efficient.
19. 3:56If you feel numb, that's a valid thing to feel. Nothing to fix.
20. 4:09If you're holding your breath at the top, stop. There's no need to hold anything.
21. 4:23Let's rest here in silence. It's short.
22. 4:33There is no correct amount of the body that will not switch off to be feeling right now. Whatever is here is the honest amount.
23. 4:52If the fidgety legs and turning mind has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
24. 5:10Count four breaths silently. Then stop counting and just follow.
25. 5:22Notice the pull to make this mean something. It doesn't have to.
26. 5:35Notice the tone of your own inner voice. Is it kind?
27. 5:47A few quiet breaths. That's all this is.
28. 5:58We'll take this slowly, and there's no version of this where you get it wrong.
29. 6:12Come back to the room through your senses, one at a time.
30. 6:25Come back to your body first, and the rest of the day second.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.