Meditation for sadness: 10-minute letting go session, in the hour before sleep

About this practice

For the times in the hour before sleep when sadness takes up more room than you would like — 10 minutes, letting go. A guided session of about 10 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: sadness

Low mood physically shows up as heaviness — a weight behind the eyes, slow movement, and a body that feels harder to lift.

It tends to show up as:

• Tears arriving on their own
• Everything feeling like an effort
• Withdrawing without deciding to

Sadness does not need to be argued away. Being steady and unhurried beside it is often more useful than trying to feel better.

Doing this before bed

• Do it in bed or somewhere you can move straight to bed after
• Lower the light, and do not check anything afterwards
• If you fall asleep before the end, it worked

Falling asleep mid-session is a success, not a failure to complete it.

How letting go works

Letting go is about loosening grip rather than dropping things. It works on the effort attached to a problem — the holding, rehearsing and bracing — which is separable from the problem itself.

• Pick one thing you are gripping and loosen a single finger
• Release the effort with the exhale, not the issue
• Set down temporarily; you can pick it up again after

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Rest your hands somewhere they don't have to do anything.
2. 0:12You have been carrying this competently for a while. A few minutes off will not undo that.
3. 0:27Bring your attention to where your body meets the surface underneath you.
4. 0:40Notice the weight of your arms without moving them.
5. 0:51Feel the slight stretch at the very bottom of the exhale.
6. 1:03Notice where you feel the breath most clearly. Nose, chest, or belly — pick one and stay there.
7. 1:19Notice the space between your shoulder blades.
8. 1:29Feel your upper arms hanging. They're heavier than you remember.
9. 1:41Feel the skin around your eyes. Let the muscles behind them go loose.
10. 1:54Notice your ears, which mostly just receive things.
11. 2:05If the quiet ache behind the eyes starts telling you a story, let the story finish without you adding to it.
12. 2:22If the grey weight of low mood shows up, let it be there without arguing with it. You are not trying to remove it, just to sit beside it.
13. 2:43If you're sleepy, sit up a little. Or let the sleepiness be there.
14. 2:56We are not solving anything in the next few minutes. We are setting it down, temporarily.
15. 3:11Quiet now. The next part will wait for you.
16. 3:22If you're replaying a conversation, let it play. It'll finish on its own.
17. 3:35Pick one thing you are gripping — a plan, a worry, a grudge — and loosen a single finger.
18. 3:51I'll leave a gap here. Use it however you like.
19. 4:03If you feel numb, that's a valid thing to feel. Nothing to fix.
20. 4:16Setting something down is not the same as giving up. You can pick it up again after.
21. 4:31A few seconds of nothing now. That's on purpose.
22. 4:42Notice whether you're breathing or holding. Start breathing again.
23. 4:53Let the breath be slow enough that you can hear it, just barely.
24. 5:06Remain here for a few more breaths.
25. 5:16Start at the top of your head. Notice the scalp, which you almost never notice.
26. 5:30Follow three breaths and let the fourth one go unobserved.
27. 5:42Let your body keep settling.
28. 5:51Feel the outline of yourself, from the top of your head to your heels.
29. 6:05Feel the air as it passes the back of your throat. It's cooler going in.
30. 6:19Let this one be unhurried.
31. 6:28Feel the tops of your thighs.
32. 6:38Notice your breathing getting quieter on its own, without you deciding anything.
33. 6:51A short silence. Let it be empty.
34. 7:01When the tears that arrive on their own arrives, name it once, quietly, and go back to the breath. Naming is not fixing, and that is fine.
35. 7:21Whatever the quiet ache behind the eyes is doing right now, your breathing can keep going underneath it.
36. 7:37Feel your breath move down your back, all the way to your lower ribs.
37. 7:51If the grey weight of low mood has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
38. 8:09If you're judging your performance, that's the same habit as judging everything else.
39. 8:22Notice any urge to check something. You can wait two more minutes.
40. 8:35No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
41. 8:46With each exhale, let a little of the effort go. Not the problem — just the effort.
42. 9:01Take the next breath slowly.
43. 9:10Wiggle your fingers and toes, gently, like you're testing that they still work.
44. 9:23Stretch whatever feels stiff, then carry on.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.