Appreciation: 7-minute letting go meditation, before an appointment

About this practice

For the times before an appointment when appreciation takes up more room than you would like — 7 minutes, letting go. A guided session of about 7 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: appreciation

Appreciation deepens by staying, not by listing. A moment held for two breaths registers differently from a moment catalogued.

It tends to show up as:

• Rushing past small kindnesses
• Not noticing ordinary comforts
• Thank-yous left unsaid

Slowing down for a moment is what turns something pleasant into something that stays with you.

Doing this in a waiting room

• You can do this with your eyes open and your hands where they are
• Nothing here needs to look like a meditation
• Aim for steadiness rather than calm

Waiting feeds the dread it is meant to relieve. Having something specific to do with the time is the useful part.

How letting go works

Letting go is about loosening grip rather than dropping things. It works on the effort attached to a problem — the holding, rehearsing and bracing — which is separable from the problem itself.

• Pick one thing you are gripping and loosen a single finger
• Release the effort with the exhale, not the issue
• Set down temporarily; you can pick it up again after

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Keep your eyes open if you like, resting on one point of the floor a metre or two ahead.
2. 0:16You have been carrying this competently for a while. A few minutes off will not undo that.
3. 0:31Imagine your thoughts as traffic on a road you're standing beside. You don't have to flag any of it down.
4. 0:48Now let your attention move from the room into your body, slowly, the way you'd move through a doorway you know well.
5. 1:06Notice the breath you're taking right now. That's the only one that exists.
6. 1:19Let the breath get soft, the way it goes when someone is reading beside you.
7. 1:33Feel the back of your neck. That's a place that holds a lot.
8. 1:46Feel your tongue sitting in the bottom of your mouth.
9. 1:58Now feel both feet at once. That's a lot of contact with the world.
10. 2:12You do not have to solve the overlooked kindnesses in these few minutes. Your only job is to keep breathing while it is here.
11. 2:31If you catch yourself fighting the ordinary moments worth savoring, that is worth noticing. The fight usually costs more than the feeling.
12. 2:49Feel the tops of your thighs.
13. 2:59Let the pause stretch out.
14. 3:08Notice if your breathing is faster than you expected. Don't correct it. Just note it.
15. 3:22If your mind is quiet, don't grab at it. Quiet comes and goes too.
16. 3:36Let's rest here in silence. It's short.
17. 3:46We are not solving anything in the next few minutes. We are setting it down, temporarily.
18. 4:01Notice the difference between a thought and the space around it.
19. 4:13Let your ribs widen on the in-breath instead of your shoulders lifting.
20. 4:26Pause here. Count three breaths if you need an anchor.
21. 4:38This is not the last time the thank-you waiting to be said will visit. That is not bad news. It means you will get more practice.
22. 4:57If the overlooked kindnesses is loud right now, make your attention smaller. Just the next breath. Nothing beyond it.
23. 5:13Let your breathing get quieter rather than deeper.
24. 5:24Notice whether you're breathing or holding. Start breathing again.
25. 5:35Notice how you're sitting. Adjust if you need to. Then settle again.
26. 5:48No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
27. 5:59Ask yourself what you could stop holding for the next sixty seconds. That one is a good start.
28. 6:15Let the last minute of quiet be the last minute of quiet.
29. 6:28Take one last look at whatever your attention settled on.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.