Anticipatory anxiety: 20-minute letting go meditation, after a bad day

About this practice

Slow, spoken guidance for anticipatory anxiety. A letting go session you can do after a bad day. A guided session of about 20 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: anticipatory anxiety

Dread of an upcoming event is often heavier than the event itself. The waiting period keeps the body in low-level alert for days.

It tends to show up as:

Stomach dropping when you remember what is coming
Sleep getting worse as the date approaches
Wanting to cancel to get relief

The anticipation is a state, not a warning. Practising being in the present while the dread is present teaches the body it can wait without bracing.

Doing this after a bad day

Do not review the day during it — that is what tomorrow is for
Something physical first, then this
Keep it short and end it deliberately

A bad day does not need a verdict. Closing it without a post-mortem is allowed.

How letting go works

Letting go is about loosening grip rather than dropping things. It works on the effort attached to a problem — the holding, rehearsing and bracing — which is separable from the problem itself.

Pick one thing you are gripping and loosen a single finger
Release the effort with the exhale, not the issue
Set down temporarily; you can pick it up again after

What happens, minute by minute

0:00Check your hands. Are they doing anything? Let them stop.
0:12You have been carrying this competently for a while. A few minutes off will not undo that.
0:27This is not a performance. Nobody is listening to how well you're doing it.
0:41Bring your attention to the parts of you that are already still.
0:54Feel your breath move down your back, all the way to your lower ribs.
1:08Breathe as if you had all evening. There's no rush in this part.
1:21Feel your upper back against whatever is behind it.
1:32Notice the space between your shoulder blades.
1:42Notice your toes, starting with the big one on the left.
1:54Notice the small movement in your belly when you breathe.
2:06Notice your jaw again. Let your back teeth part slightly.
2:18Feel the weight of the nervous hours before somewhere specific, then let the floor take a share of it.
2:34Imagine the dread of an event that has not happened as a room you can walk out of for a minute. The room will still be there.
2:54Let your belly rise first, then your chest, then the tops of your lungs.
3:08When the waiting that feels heavier than the thing arrives, name it once, quietly, and go back to the breath. Naming is not fixing, and that is fine.
3:28Let the nervous hours before be exactly as big as it is, and let your breath be exactly as slow as it is. They can coexist.
3:47Let the in-breath be short and the out-breath unhurried.
3:58If you're irritated, that's allowed. Irritation is just weather.
4:09Pick one thing you are gripping — a plan, a worry, a grudge — and loosen a single finger.
4:25I'll stop for a moment. Take the pause at your own speed.
4:38If you're distracted by a sound, let the sound be the object for a moment.
4:52Ask yourself what you could stop holding for the next sixty seconds. That one is a good start.
5:08I'll step back. You stay here.
5:18Notice any part of you that wants this to be over.
5:30Setting something down is not the same as giving up. You can pick it up again after.
5:45Let me stop talking. Follow the breath instead.
5:56If your mind is quiet, don't grab at it. Quiet comes and goes too.
6:10With each exhale, let a little of the effort go. Not the problem — just the effort.
6:25Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
6:37Notice the tone of your own inner voice. Is it kind?
6:49Let this one be unhurried.
6:58Let your breathing get quieter rather than deeper.
7:09Let the whole of your right foot be heavy.
7:20Let's pause. Just the breathing for a while.
7:31Notice how you're sitting. Adjust if you need to. Then settle again.
7:44Let your body keep settling.
7:53Feel the air move past your upper lip. It's the coolest spot on the way in.
8:08Feel the front of your chest. Notice it rise and fall once.
8:21A few seconds of nothing now. That's on purpose.
8:32Notice if you've been frowning at your own thoughts.
8:43No need to open your eyes yet.
8:53Notice the small pause before your body decides to breathe in again.
9:06Notice your hands again. Check whether they've loosened on their own.
9:18A short silence. Let it be empty.
9:28Notice if your attention is in the future. Bring it back to the room.
9:42Notice the first breath of the day versus this one. They're the same mechanism.
9:56Stay here a little longer.
10:05Notice how quickly your mind labels things: good, bad, boring, nice.
10:17Quiet for a moment. No need to fill it.
10:28Notice your eyebrows. They're probably doing something small right now.
10:40Let the exhale fall out rather than pushing it.
10:51Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
11:01If your body wants to move, let it move, then come back.
11:14A gap. Don't rush to fill it with thinking.
11:25Now feel both feet at once. That's a lot of contact with the world.
11:39Count down from ten, one number per exhale.
11:50Let it be this simple.
11:59Notice anything you're holding onto from earlier today.
12:10Let's rest here in silence. It's short.
12:20Feel the middle of your back, the part that never gets attention.
12:33Let each breath out be a small letting go of the muscles around your ribs.
12:47Stay with it.
12:55Let your thumbs rest wherever they landed.
13:05Notice your breathing getting quieter on its own, without you deciding anything.
13:18Let the pause stretch out.
13:27Notice your fingers, one by one, starting with the little finger.
13:39Let the out-breath be a little longer than the in-breath, without forcing it.
13:52Keep following the air.
14:01Feel your belly. Let it be soft instead of held in.
14:13Count four breaths silently. Then stop counting and just follow.
14:25Remain here for a few more breaths.
14:35Feel your hips. Wide, heavy, and doing nothing.
14:46Give the dread of an event that has not happened a shape, a colour, a temperature. Turning it into something specific makes it easier to hold.
15:05Pause here. Count three breaths if you need an anchor.
15:17Whatever the waiting that feels heavier than the thing is doing right now, your breathing can keep going underneath it.
15:34Let the breath get soft, the way it goes when someone is reading beside you.
15:48You do not have to like the nervous hours before to breathe through it. Liking was never the requirement.
16:04If the dread of an event that has not happened has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
16:23Follow one full breath from the moment it starts to the moment it ends.
16:37Notice the space around the waiting that feels heavier than the thing. It is there, even if it is small. Put your attention in that space.
16:56Say to yourself: this is uncomfortable, and I can stay with it for one more breath. Then take that breath.
17:13Let the breath be shallow if shallow is what your body wants.
17:26If your mind has wandered, that's not a mistake. Noticing is the practice.
17:39If you're judging your performance, that's the same habit as judging everything else.
17:52If you're thinking about the next thing on your list, that list will still be there.
18:07Nothing to follow for a moment except your own breathing.
18:19We are not solving anything in the next few minutes. We are setting it down, temporarily.
18:34Just the breath, still.
18:43Stretch whatever feels stiff, then carry on.
18:53Before you move, notice one thing that's fine right now.
19:05Nothing changes for a moment.

Questions people ask

What does this session help with?

Dread of an upcoming event is often heavier than the event itself. The waiting period keeps the body in low-level alert for days. The anticipation is a state, not a warning. Practising being in the present while the dread is present teaches the body it can wait without bracing.

Where and when should I do this one?

Do not review the day during it — that is what tomorrow is for. A bad day does not need a verdict. Closing it without a post-mortem is allowed.

What actually happens during the 20 minutes?

Letting go is about loosening grip rather than dropping things. It works on the effort attached to a problem — the holding, rehearsing and bracing — which is separable from the problem itself.

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.