20-minute guided softening practice for waking up — in the morning

About this practice

20 minutes to meet waking up with less of a fight. A softening practice, in the morning. A guided session of about 20 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: waking up

On waking, the brain passes through a slow transition rather than switching on. Rushing it leaves you foggy for the first hour.

It tends to show up as:

• Needing a long time to feel awake
• Foggy, irritable mornings
• The day starting before you are ready

Giving the body a few unhurried minutes at the start changes the tone of everything that follows.

Doing this in the morning

• Do it before checking your phone — the first minutes set the tone for the rest
• Sitting up is better than lying down, or you will drift back to sleep
• Light on your face helps more than any practice

Mornings can become a performance of productive habits. This one does not need to be done well.

How softening works

Softening is the practice of releasing held tension degree by degree rather than all at once. It targets the physical grip — shoulders, jaw, gut — that persists long after the stressor has passed.

• Soften one place per exhale rather than everything at once
• Let warmth and gravity do the work instead of muscular effort
• If a place will not soften, leave it and go somewhere that will

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Check your hands. Are they doing anything? Let them stop.
2. 0:12We'll keep it quiet and unhurried.
3. 0:22Let your sense of the room shrink down to just your body and the surface you're on.
4. 0:37We'll start broad and narrow down. Nothing sudden is coming.
5. 0:49Follow three breaths and let the fourth one go unobserved.
6. 1:01Feel the slight stretch at the very bottom of the exhale.
7. 1:13Notice your pelvis resting on the surface below you.
8. 1:24Notice the backs of your knees, which you feel more than you think.
9. 1:37Notice your heels making contact with the floor or the bed.
10. 1:49Notice your whole body as one shape, sitting or lying here.
11. 2:01Feel your belly. Let it be soft instead of held in.
12. 2:13If the fog of just-woken is loud right now, make your attention smaller. Just the next breath. Nothing beyond it.
13. 2:30Give the morning body that needs a moment a shape, a colour, a temperature. Turning it into something specific makes it easier to hold.
14. 2:49Let the breath move at the speed of a sleeping person.
15. 3:01There is no correct amount of the slow start of the day to be feeling right now. Whatever is here is the honest amount.
16. 3:20Imagine softening the edges of the fog of just-woken. Not erasing it, just letting the sharp parts go a degree softer.
17. 3:37Notice the small gap after each exhale. Rest there for half a second.
18. 3:50Notice if you've been frowning at your own thoughts.
19. 4:01Small efforts are the whole method.
20. 4:11Let's rest here in silence. It's short.
21. 4:21Notice the moment you realise you've drifted. That moment is the whole skill.
22. 4:34There's no need to try harder than this.
23. 4:45Quiet for a moment. No need to fill it.
24. 4:56Notice any tension that arrived while you weren't looking.
25. 5:07Let this be easy, if easy is available.
26. 5:18A gap. Don't rush to fill it with thinking.
27. 5:29Notice any urge to check something. You can wait two more minutes.
28. 5:42Nothing here needs to be efficient.
29. 5:52I'll stop for a moment. Take the pause at your own speed.
30. 6:05Notice the difference between a thought and the space around it.
31. 6:17If you only manage half of it, that's half more than nothing.
32. 6:30A few seconds of nothing now. That's on purpose.
33. 6:41Notice if you're being hard on yourself about any of this.
34. 6:53You can be as unimpressive as you like for the next few minutes.
35. 7:06No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
36. 7:17Notice how you're sitting. Adjust if you need to. Then settle again.
37. 7:30Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
38. 7:40Count down from ten, one number per exhale.
39. 7:51Notice your eyebrows. They're probably doing something small right now.
40. 8:03Quiet now. The next part will wait for you.
41. 8:14Notice the tone of your own inner voice. Is it kind?
42. 8:26Let your body keep settling.
43. 8:35Let your belly rise first, then your chest, then the tops of your lungs.
44. 8:49Feel the outline of yourself, from the top of your head to your heels.
45. 9:03A short silence. Let it be empty.
46. 9:13If your mind is quiet, don't grab at it. Quiet comes and goes too.
47. 9:27Let your breathing be boring. Boring is good here.
48. 9:38Take the next breath slowly.
49. 9:47Notice whether you're breathing or holding. Start breathing again.
50. 9:58I'll step back. You stay here.
51. 10:08Let your throat soften. There's nothing to swallow right now.
52. 10:20Let the in-breath be short and the out-breath unhurried.
53. 10:31Let it be this simple.
54. 10:40If you feel restless, that's a feeling, not a failure.
55. 10:52I'll leave a gap here. Use it however you like.
56. 11:04Let the whole of your left foot be heavy.
57. 11:15Let the exhale fall out rather than pushing it.
58. 11:26Nothing changes for a moment.
59. 11:35Let the whole of your right foot be heavy.
60. 11:46Notice the difference between the breath at the front of your nose and the breath in your chest.
61. 12:02Remain here for a few more breaths.
62. 12:12Feel your upper arms hanging. They're heavier than you remember.
63. 12:24Let the exhale empty you a little more than usual, but not to the point of strain.
64. 12:39Just the breath, still.
65. 12:48Notice the small movement in your belly when you breathe.
66. 13:00Follow one full breath from the moment it starts to the moment it ends.
67. 13:14A few seconds more.
68. 13:23Notice your jaw again. Let your back teeth part slightly.
69. 13:35Breathe as if you had all evening. There's no rush in this part.
70. 13:48No need to open your eyes yet.
71. 13:58Notice your wrists. They bend a lot in a day.
72. 14:10If you're holding your breath at the top, stop. There's no need to hold anything.
73. 14:24Stay with it.
74. 14:32Notice your shins, which take small knocks all day and never complain.
75. 14:45Let the exhale carry a little of the morning body that needs a moment with it. Not all of it. Just a little, one breath at a time.
76. 15:05Nothing to follow for a moment except your own breathing.
77. 15:17You do not have to solve the slow start of the day in these few minutes. Your only job is to keep breathing while it is here.
78. 15:37Notice the breath you're taking right now. That's the only one that exists.
79. 15:50Notice how the fog of just-woken changes shape when you stop resisting it. Usually it gets smaller, not bigger.
80. 16:06You have been carrying the morning body that needs a moment for a while. You can set it down for the length of this session and pick it up after.
81. 16:27Feel your breath move down your back, all the way to your lower ribs.
82. 16:41You do not have to win against the slow start of the day. You only have to breathe until the next moment arrives.
83. 16:59Say to yourself: this is uncomfortable, and I can stay with it for one more breath. Then take that breath.
84. 17:16Let your shoulders stay still while your ribs move.
85. 17:27If you're irritated, that's allowed. Irritation is just weather.
86. 17:38If you feel numb, that's a valid thing to feel. Nothing to fix.
87. 17:51If you've lost track of where we were, you haven't lost anything important.
88. 18:04Silence. Let your shoulders drop again if they've crept up.
89. 18:16We'll take this slowly, and there's no version of this where you get it wrong.
90. 18:30Let the quiet do its work.
91. 18:40Let the next breath be the start of the rest of the day.
92. 18:53Roll your neck once, slowly, in whichever direction feels good.
93. 19:05Stay here a little longer.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.