How to use Tight box breathing for a hard conversation, when you are not sure this will work (4 · 1 · 4 · 1)

How it works

Four equal sides: 4 in, 1 held, 4 out, 1 held. Nothing else to remember. Not being sure it will work is a perfectly good reason to try it once. We'll stay close to sensations rather than ideas.

Why it can help

Nothing about it asks you to feel different afterwards. That takes the pressure off entirely.

The pattern, in seconds

Phase	Length	Starts at
Inhale	4s	0s
Hold	1s	4s
Exhale	4s	5s
Hold again	1s	9s

One round is 10 seconds. At the default 12 rounds this practice runs 120 seconds — about 2 minutes — plus a breath or two of ordinary breathing between rounds.

Good for

when the afternoon has gone flat
when the day has been fine but you still feel braced
on a train or a bus, with your bag on your lap

Tips

Do not chase the feeling. If nothing happens, nothing happened.
If your mind wanders to counting the rounds left, that is normal. Come back to the numbers.
Holding your breath is optional in every exercise here. You can always breathe through instead.

Please note

If holding your breath makes you dizzy or uncomfortable, skip the holds entirely and breathe slowly and evenly instead. Never push through lightheadedness. If you are pregnant, or manage a heart, blood pressure or lung condition, check with a doctor before doing breath holds.