Self-compassion for work stress: 5 minutes, in the hour before sleep

About this practice

Slow, spoken guidance for work stress. A self-compassion session you can do in the hour before sleep. A guided session of about 5 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: work stress

Work stress is usually unfinished business. The brain keeps the task open in the background, so you are partly at work even when you have stopped.

It tends to show up as:

• Running through your task list at night
• Feeling behind even when caught up
• Dreading opening the laptop

A clear break with an actual end lets the background process pause. Short and complete beats long and vague.

Doing this before bed

• Do it in bed or somewhere you can move straight to bed after
• Lower the light, and do not check anything afterwards
• If you fall asleep before the end, it worked

Falling asleep mid-session is a success, not a failure to complete it.

How self-compassion works

Self-compassion practice changes the tone of the inner voice rather than the content of the thoughts. It uses the same warmth and steadiness you would offer a friend, applied without requiring you to have earned it.

• Use the words you would actually say to someone you love
• Ask what you need, not what you deserve
• A hand on the chest or belly gives warmth and pressure a place to land

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Drop your attention from your head into your chest for a second.
2. 0:13Whatever you are about to say to yourself, imagine saying it to someone you love. Use those words.
3. 0:29Bring your attention to where your body meets the surface underneath you.
4. 0:42Notice your own pulse somewhere. Wrist, throat, wherever you can find it.
5. 0:55Notice the small gap after each exhale. Rest there for half a second.
6. 1:08Follow one full breath from the moment it starts to the moment it ends.
7. 1:22Feel the outline of yourself, from the top of your head to your heels.
8. 1:36Notice your pelvis resting on the surface below you.
9. 1:47Feel the tops of your thighs.
10. 1:57Let the pause stretch out.
11. 2:06I'll step back. You stay here.
12. 2:16Put a hand where the feeling is strongest. Warmth and pressure are the oldest kind of reassurance.
13. 2:31If a worry shows up, name it quietly and let it sit beside you.
14. 2:45Give the pressure of expectations a shape, a colour, a temperature. Turning it into something specific makes it easier to hold.
15. 3:02If the feeling of always being behind has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
16. 3:20Let the breath get soft, the way it goes when someone is reading beside you.
17. 3:34Think of the inbox that never empties as a guest that arrived without knocking. You can let it stand in the hallway.
18. 3:52If nothing much is happening, that's not a problem. Nothing much is often the point.
19. 4:06Silence for a few breaths. Nothing to do in it.
20. 4:18You are allowed to have a hard time without earning it first.
21. 4:31Let your jaw, shoulders and hands be loose as you finish.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.