Meditation for anticipatory anxiety: 10-minute softening session, in the late afternoon

About this practice

A 10-minute softening session for anticipatory anxiety, in the late afternoon. No app, no account — press start. A guided session of about 10 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: anticipatory anxiety

Dread of an upcoming event is often heavier than the event itself. The waiting period keeps the body in low-level alert for days.

It tends to show up as:

• Stomach dropping when you remember what is coming
• Sleep getting worse as the date approaches
• Wanting to cancel to get relief

The anticipation is a state, not a warning. Practising being in the present while the dread is present teaches the body it can wait without bracing.

Doing this after a long day

• Something physical first — shoes off, hands washed, water drunk
• Do not review the day during it
• Keep it short rather than thorough

Replaying the day in the practice just carries the day further into the evening.

How softening works

Softening is the practice of releasing held tension degree by degree rather than all at once. It targets the physical grip — shoulders, jaw, gut — that persists long after the stressor has passed.

• Soften one place per exhale rather than everything at once
• Let warmth and gravity do the work instead of muscular effort
• If a place will not soften, leave it and go somewhere that will

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Notice the heaviest part of your body right now. Let it be heavy.
2. 0:13Let the exhale do the work. On each one, allow a little more give.
3. 0:27Let your body feel heavier than it did a minute ago. Let the chair or the floor take it.
4. 0:43If some part of you is resisting this, that resistance is worth noticing too.
5. 0:57Let the breath be shallow if shallow is what your body wants.
6. 1:10Let your breathing get quieter rather than deeper.
7. 1:21Feel the middle of your back, the part that never gets attention.
8. 1:34Let your thumbs rest wherever they landed.
9. 1:44Now the right shoulder. Let it be a centimetre lower than it was.
10. 1:57Let your throat soften. There's nothing to swallow right now.
11. 2:09Notice the space around the nervous hours before. It is there, even if it is small. Put your attention in that space.
12. 2:27You are allowed to be unimpressed by the dread of an event that has not happened. Indifference is a legitimate response.
13. 2:44If nothing much is happening, that's not a problem. Nothing much is often the point.
14. 2:58If a place will not soften, leave it alone and go somewhere that will. It often follows.
15. 3:13I'll step back. You stay here.
16. 3:23Notice how you're sitting. Adjust if you need to. Then settle again.
17. 3:36We are not forcing anything open. We are letting things unclench by a single degree.
18. 3:50I'll be quiet for a moment. Stay with the breath.
19. 4:02Notice whether you're breathing or holding. Start breathing again.
20. 4:13With every out-breath, soften one place. Shoulders first, then jaw, then the space behind the eyes.
21. 4:28Pause here. Count three breaths if you need an anchor.
22. 4:40Notice any urge to check something. You can wait two more minutes.
23. 4:53Let your breathing be boring. Boring is good here.
24. 5:04Stay with it.
25. 5:12Notice the small movement in your belly when you breathe.
26. 5:24Let your breathing find the rhythm it uses when you're almost asleep.
27. 5:37Let this one be unhurried.
28. 5:46Notice your eyebrows. They're probably doing something small right now.
29. 5:58Count four breaths silently. Then stop counting and just follow.
30. 6:10Let your body keep settling.
31. 6:19Let your whole body be as heavy as it wants to be.
32. 6:32Let the exhale empty you a little more than usual, but not to the point of strain.
33. 6:47Nothing to follow for a moment except your own breathing.
34. 6:59If the waiting that feels heavier than the thing starts telling you a story, let the story finish without you adding to it.
35. 7:17Notice how the nervous hours before changes shape when you stop resisting it. Usually it gets smaller, not bigger.
36. 7:33Notice the small gap after each exhale. Rest there for half a second.
37. 7:46When the dread of an event that has not happened arrives, name it once, quietly, and go back to the breath. Naming is not fixing, and that is fine.
38. 8:07If a worry shows up, name it quietly and let it sit beside you.
39. 8:21Notice if you've been frowning at your own thoughts.
40. 8:32A few seconds of nothing now. That's on purpose.
41. 8:43Unclenching is not the same as relaxing. Just stop adding the tension back.
42. 8:56Nothing changes for a moment.
43. 9:05If you're going straight back to work, take ten seconds at the doorway first.
44. 9:19Start to notice the edges of your body again, and the surface you're on.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.