20-minute softening meditation for mindfulness, on a meeting break

About this practice

When mindfulness shows up on a meeting break, this 20-minute softening session gives you somewhere to put it down. A guided session of about 20 minutes, suited to all levels. Nothing is recorded and no account is needed.

What this works on: mindfulness

Attention spends most of its time in the past or the future. Being present is not a state you find, it is a return you keep making.

It tends to show up as:

• Missing conversations while composing replies
• Arriving somewhere with no memory of the walk
• Eating without tasting

Every return to the senses is a repetition of the actual skill. Losing it is part of the practice, not a break in it.

Doing this between meetings

• Start it in the gap, not after the next one begins
• Write down the open thread from the last meeting first, then let it go
• Two minutes done beats five minutes planned

The back-to-back day is exactly why the gap has to be protected rather than used for one more task.

How softening works

Softening is the practice of releasing held tension degree by degree rather than all at once. It targets the physical grip — shoulders, jaw, gut — that persists long after the stressor has passed.

• Soften one place per exhale rather than everything at once
• Let warmth and gravity do the work instead of muscular effort
• If a place will not soften, leave it and go somewhere that will

What happens, minute by minute

1. 0:00Let the floor take your weight through your feet, and stop holding yourself up for a second.
2. 0:15We'll take this slowly, and there's no version of this where you get it wrong.
3. 0:29If some part of you is resisting this, that resistance is worth noticing too.
4. 0:43If it helps, imagine your attention is a torch beam. Right now it's wide and soft.
5. 0:58Let each breath out be a small letting go of the muscles around your ribs.
6. 1:12Feel the air as it passes the back of your throat. It's cooler going in.
7. 1:26Start at the top of your head. Notice the scalp, which you almost never notice.
8. 1:40Now feel both feet at once. That's a lot of contact with the world.
9. 1:54Move to your forehead. Let it be smooth instead of gathered.
10. 2:06Feel the back of your neck. That's a place that holds a lot.
11. 2:19Let your throat soften. There's nothing to swallow right now.
12. 2:31If the present moment you keep leaving shows up, let it be there without arguing with it. You are not trying to remove it, just to sit beside it.
13. 2:52You do not have to like the here-and-now your attention skips to breathe through it. Liking was never the requirement.
14. 3:09Feel your breath move down your back, all the way to your lower ribs.
15. 3:23Feel the weight of the ordinary present tense somewhere specific, then let the floor take a share of it.
16. 3:39If the present moment you keep leaving has been with you all day, it is probably tired too. Let it rest alongside you.
17. 3:57Breathe in for four, out for six, if you'd like something to count.
18. 4:10If you're irritated, that's allowed. Irritation is just weather.
19. 4:21There's no need to try harder than this.
20. 4:32Pause here. Count three breaths if you need an anchor.
21. 4:44If you're distracted by a sound, let the sound be the object for a moment.
22. 4:58You can be as unimpressive as you like for the next few minutes.
23. 5:11A few seconds of nothing now. That's on purpose.
24. 5:22Notice the moment you realise you've drifted. That moment is the whole skill.
25. 5:35Small efforts are the whole method.
26. 5:45I'll stop for a moment. Take the pause at your own speed.
27. 5:58You might be planning something. Notice the planning, then come back.
28. 6:10Nothing here needs to be efficient.
29. 6:20Let's pause. Just the breathing for a while.
30. 6:31If your mind is quiet, don't grab at it. Quiet comes and goes too.
31. 6:45Let this be easy, if easy is available.
32. 6:56I'll be quiet for a moment. Stay with the breath.
33. 7:08Notice the exact moment your attention left. You probably won't catch it. That's normal.
34. 7:22If you only manage half of it, that's half more than nothing.
35. 7:35Silence for a few breaths. Nothing to do in it.
36. 7:47If you're judging your performance, that's the same habit as judging everything else.
37. 8:00Let your body keep settling.
38. 8:09Notice how many breaths you take in a minute. Don't change the number, just check.
39. 8:23Feel the soles of your feet. All the weight of you goes through them.
40. 8:37A short silence. Let it be empty.
41. 8:47If you're replaying a conversation, let it play. It'll finish on its own.
42. 9:00Stay here a little longer.
43. 9:09Feel the slight stretch at the very bottom of the exhale.
44. 9:21Feel the outline of yourself, from the top of your head to your heels.
45. 9:35Let's rest here in silence. It's short.
46. 9:45Just the breath, still.
47. 9:54Notice how quickly your mind labels things: good, bad, boring, nice.
48. 10:06I'll step back. You stay here.
49. 10:16Feel your ankles. Let them be loose.
50. 10:26Follow three breaths and let the fourth one go unobserved.
51. 10:38Nothing changes for a moment.
52. 10:47If you've lost track of where we were, you haven't lost anything important.
53. 11:00Quiet for a moment. No need to fill it.
54. 11:11Notice your ears, which mostly just receive things.
55. 11:22Notice that you don't have to start a breath. It arrives by itself.
56. 11:35Stay a moment longer than is comfortable.
57. 11:45Notice your toes, starting with the big one on the left.
58. 11:57Let the breath move at the speed of a sleeping person.
59. 12:09Let it be this simple.
60. 12:18Let the whole of your right foot be heavy.
61. 12:29Notice if your breathing is faster than you expected. Don't correct it. Just note it.
62. 12:43No rush to move on.
63. 12:52Feel your knees. They're just hinges, but they've worked hard.
64. 13:04If you're holding your breath at the top, stop. There's no need to hold anything.
65. 13:18Let the pause stretch out.
66. 13:27Feel the middle of your back, the part that never gets attention.
67. 13:40Let your shoulders stay still while your ribs move.
68. 13:51Let this one be unhurried.
69. 14:00Notice your whole body as one shape, sitting or lying here.
70. 14:12Breathe as if you had all evening. There's no rush in this part.
71. 14:25Keep following the air.
72. 14:34Notice the space between your shoulder blades.
73. 14:44Imagine the here-and-now your attention skips as a room you can walk out of for a minute. The room will still be there.
74. 15:02No words for a moment. Only the next breath.
75. 15:13Remind yourself, slowly: I am safe in this moment, even while the ordinary present tense is here. Safety and difficulty can share a room.
76. 15:32Notice where you feel the breath most clearly. Nose, chest, or belly — pick one and stay there.
77. 15:48Let the present moment you keep leaving be exactly as big as it is, and let your breath be exactly as slow as it is. They can coexist.
78. 16:08If the here-and-now your attention skips starts telling you a story, let the story finish without you adding to it.
79. 16:25Notice the small gap after each exhale. Rest there for half a second.
80. 16:38You do not have to solve the ordinary present tense in these few minutes. Your only job is to keep breathing while it is here.
81. 16:57If you catch yourself fighting the present moment you keep leaving, that is worth noticing. The fight usually costs more than the feeling.
82. 17:15Notice the first breath of the day versus this one. They're the same mechanism.
83. 17:29If a song is stuck in your head, let it play in the background.
84. 17:43If you're bored, stay with the boredom for a moment. It's usually thinner than it looks.
85. 17:58If your body wants to move, let it move, then come back.
86. 18:11Quiet now. The next part will wait for you.
87. 18:22We'll keep it quiet and unhurried.
88. 18:32Remain here for a few more breaths.
89. 18:42Let your shoulders come back up to their usual place, if they want to.
90. 18:56If you're going straight back to work, take ten seconds at the doorway first.
91. 19:10No need to open your eyes yet.

Questions people ask

Meditation is a practice, not a treatment. If you are dealing with ongoing distress, please also reach out to a professional.