Guide · calm · 3 min read
Using your body to come down after something stressful, in the order that helps, if you are new to this
After a stress response, the body is left with fuel it did not use. Some of the recovery is physical, not mental.
Start here
Six things, in the order that makes the most difference. The first two do most of the work.
Nothing here assumes you have done this before.
If you only do one thing from this page, do the first point below. It is first because it removes the most friction for the least effort.
What helps
Give yourself a fixed amount of time to be angry or upset about it. Then move to the next thing. The time limit matters more than the amount.
Tell someone what happened, briefly. Saying it out loud closes the loop in a way that thinking it does not.
Do not go straight into problem-solving while your heart is still going. Your judgement is genuinely worse in the first twenty minutes.
What to do when it does not work
Move first, think later. A brisk ten-minute walk uses up some of what the stress response prepared your body to do.
Eat something if it has been a long time. Low blood sugar feels almost exactly like anxiety.
Shake out your hands and shoulders. Animals do this after a fright, and it works on the same system in people.
Questions people ask
Does venting help?
Once, to one person, yes. Repeatedly to everyone, no — it tends to keep the feeling active rather than discharge it.
What if I cannot exercise?
Then slow breathing with a long exhale, cold water on the wrists, and a change of room do a smaller version of the same job.
Written for people who want the practical version. No accounts, no tracking, no newsletter wall.